This post is a continuation of the previous one – Shifty Mansionic Dimensions, inspired by and dedicated to my wonderfully imaginative friend, Tom – You can visit Tom’s blog at The Mansionic Perspective and share in the wonders of his blog world, where you can also enjoy his perspective of the trip through The Galactic Vortex – following on from Shifty Mansionic Dimensions on this blog. You can learn all about gargoyles in his post The Winged Lion and the Gargoyle, and enjoy a further fantastic post about Winged Wolves so do check this one out as well – it’s awesome! The Wild Winged Wolves of the Wilderness
Tom was rather ‘pleased to discover that he had taken on the personification of the Greek god of the Stars, or more precisely, of the Dusk, Stars, Planets and the art of Astronomy and Astrology – one of the Titans who had fought against Zeus and the Olympian gods.
“Oh TomAstraeus!” his inner woman Thomasina, gushed delightedly, now personifying the Greek goddess of nocturnal oracles and the stars – Asteria, the starry one. “You are a god! A Greek god no less! And so very becoming in your Tomga!”
Momentarily lost for words, not having realised just how beautiful his inner woman was until now and a little wide-eyed and breathless at the realisation that she was also a Greek goddess, he finally found the right words, “You scrub up pretty good yourself ThomasinAsteria!”
“Fingers,” Tom’s Inner Typist, currently perched on his shoulder, scratched his head thoughtfully, running his fingers appreciatively through Tom’s flowing, golden locks, and pointed downwards to his legs… Tom glanced down and was surprised to see how hairy his legs had become. Following his gaze ThomasinAsteria gasped in admiration/admiringly, adding, “Such a strong and manly god too!”
Fingers fell off Tom’s shoulder and curled up on the ground shaking helplessly – laughing hysterically of course, Tom noted disdainfully. “Do not mock the gods!” he intoned imperiously!
“Oh TomAstraeus!” ThomasinAsteria squealed, bursting with pride at such baritone godly intonations. Ignoring Fingers whose hysterics were clearly getting out of control, Tom smiled indulgently and gave her a knee-tremblingly, strong-god-very-much-in-control-of-his-own-destiny type of look.
Lady Tomette, another of Tom’s inner feminine sides, having taken on the personification of the Egyptian goddess Nut – sky goddess, and goddess of the night, rebirth, and fertility, snorted impishly, eyeing up Tom’s hairy legs. “It’s not your lucky day TomAstraeus! I consulted ‘The calendar of lucky and unlucky days’ and it’s not looking good for you! Come! Let us head down to the marketplace and buy a magic spell or two to change your destiny! I will beseech the gods at the temples (we have over 2000 gods to beseech) and they will surely take pity on you!”
“But I am a god!” Tom protested indignantly.
“Well…yes…of sorts…. But you are not an EGYPTIAN god!!”
“Come TomAstraeus! We will take the Chariot of Fire and go immediately to the marketplace and the temple of the gods!”
“The Tommy knockers are on strike!” Tom’s Inner Leader of the Opposition announced”
“Really? They’re all on strike?”
“Yes. We balloted them for strike action and there was a clear majority for striking.”
“They can’t do that! Who’s going to answer the door?!!”
“We’re in Egypt now so no reason why they should be opening doors all day long!” The opposition leader answered smugly.
“Well, where have they gone?!!”
“Into your inner mine TomAstraeus – it’s very busy in there – tommy knockers, glowing volcanic pyramid rocks, that you may have noticed are marked with the sign of Seba, the symbol of the stars. black wolf gargoyle door knockers to guard the entrances…They’re all in there!”
“Oh gods!! The Tommy Knockers are on strike! We must open the doors ourselves! TomAstraeus – you must open the doors for us – it would be very unseemly for a goddess to do so!”
“What! Lady TometteNut? I? TomAstraeus the Titan, who fought against Zeus and the Olympian gods? I must open the door?!! Oh gods!”
“Just do it TomAstreaus! We have not a moment to spare and goddesses cannot sully their hands on doorknobs!”
“Fingers! You do it!”
“Oh TomAstraeus,” TomasinAsteria almost swooned at his godly masterfulness.
As Tom had discovered, the Portal in the bathroom of his Mansion was a way INTO his mind not OUT OF his Mansion, which had since taken on an Egyptian persona, and Tom himself, that of a Greek god – proving decisively that Tom was now completely out of his mind. And whilst the “Giant multi-faceted nebula vortex in the bathroom” was still sporting “tentacles stretching down the stairs,” that was now a ramp, there were many other bathrooms scattered around his Egyptian Villa-Mansion. There were also several storerooms full of sealed jars of food, which Tom fondly referred to as “Parlours of the gods”.
The “Grand Staircase” had been replaced by the “Grand Ramp,” ramps being the gold standard in Egyptian homes. Both the front and back doors were also reached by a ramp and since the Tommy Knockers were on strike and the evil wolf gargoyle door knocker had apparently gone to the Market place – according to ThomasinAsteria who had also visited the market place on the hunt for Egyptian make-up products, citing a need to develop a more Egyptian goddess look so as not to be upstaged by Lady TometteNut, Tom should have been free to roam god-like and uninterrupted through his finely adorned Egyptian Villa-Manor. However, it now seemed to be imperative that they must all visit the temple of the gods and pay a visit to the marketplace to buy the necessary spells to change his destiny.
It was at this point that his Inner Werewolf – Tommy woke up and announced its desire to visit “The Grinds” which was now “The Egyptian Grand Garden of the gods.” Tom’s Inner Creator- had been hard at work building and decorating pyramids and tombs for Egyptian Pharaohs, occasionally accompanied by Tom’s Inner Ghost, but when Tom’s inner Opposition Leader got involved, it had soon set to work on decorating the walls of the Villa-Mansion, spicing up the indoor gardens and adding an abundance of brightly coloured fish to the indoor pools, the results of which it was highly impressed with. Even more so the decoration of the outer walls of the The Grinds which was fit for the gods. The Inner Opposition Leader was putting on a show of cockiness, but the Inner Creator was determined to take all the credit. Tombie the Inner Zombie was handy for knocking them off their perch, the only problem being that bits of Tombie were falling off into the laps of the Opposition Party. And the inner creator had accidently pushed Tombie into the fountain used by Egyptian Villa Mansions for natural home air-conditioning, causing him to lose his head and trip over the bathroom pipework and into another vortex in the master bedroom bathroom. This in turn blocked up the pipes and a piece of Tombie’s leg was regurgitated into the Villa-Mansion fountains to the disgust of Thomasina who was posing amongst the daisies and cornflowers of the indoor gardens for a goddess photo shoot, shot by Fingers the inner typist.
Hotly pursued by a variety of glowing volcanic rock artefacts that had materialised at the mention of Chariots and fire, Tom and his goddesses headed for the front door of the Egyptian Villa-Mansion where Tom, not wishing to sully his godly hands on the doorknob any more than the goddesses, opted for grabbing a handy volcanic rock artefact and flinging/hurling it at the doorway. The door flew open at speed not keen on such a collision and the risk of a very unattractive burn on itself. In response the rock billowed and exploded into a glowing pyramid portal adorned with the 5-pointer star of the Seba, symbol of stars, constellations, and star gods, associated with doors and gateways according to his Tomipedia, which he had previously turned off, but which in a fit of huffiness had defiantly switched itself back on.
ThomasinAsteria, keen to exercise her Greek goddess credentials alongside the regular star goddess ones, dived unperturbed into its glowing depths grabbing Tom’s Tomga as she went, and hauling him into a hurtling trip through the portal to land on board the chariot of fire, chased to the marketplace by the glowing volcanic pyramid artefacts.
Sand and pyramids and the River Nile flashed by them, Tom’s smart mansionone snapping the scenes with wild abandon while Tombie lost a leg in the chariot wheels and Tom’s Inner Werewolf – Tommy awoke and gave chase to the glowing volcanic pyramid rocks bouncing cheerily alongside them flashing their Seba symbols whilst giving Tom the non-Egyptian god, the evil eye. Fingers gamely drove the chariot giving little heed to the busy ride as he gave the horses free rein to transport them at the highest speed possible.
Tom couldn’t help but notice the portal seemed to be accompanying them, and that Lady TometteNut was still half in and half out of it waving a volcanic pyramid rock furiously at Tom and the now decapitated Tombie. Tombie grinned and did a quick search for the rest of his body but the legs had already run it off to find some fine Egyptian linen for itself at the marketplace. And Tombie had sand in his eyes so he could no longer see much beyond a pyramid or 2 and what might and might not have been the odd pharaoh. Tom was preoccupied trying to catch his inner werewolf before the world collapsed and after all he was tasked with saving it.